I Need an eBay Chaperone, STAT!
I'm usually a very astute shopper, but today I had a misstep.
I've been in desperate need of a digital camera for quite some time now, and since I'm the last person on earth who doesn't have one, I decided that it was now or never. As far as purchases go, I usually do a very good job, and I almost always walk away with something that I really like. I'm not afraid to spend a lot of money on something, but like any person with 3 brain cells, I'd rather spend less if I can.
So, that was my motivation for going on eBay to purchase a digital camera this afternoon. I've known people who have gotten so addicted to eBay that they'd sell their toenails on there if it didn't hurt to rip them off, so I wanted to exercise caution and discretion. I wanted to go on the site, find an adequate digital camera, and then log off, never to darken eBay's door again.
First off, I see this digital camera for $7.99. Now, I'm a smart girl, but for some reason, by brains slid out of my pants when I saw the price. Shipping and handling was another $7.00. You're telling me I can have my very own digital camera for less than 15 bucks? Oh hell yes, I want it!
I should have known that something was wrong when I was the only bidder. There are always at least 75,000 people bidding for the most obscure things on eBay, so why wouldn't there be other sensible people trying to grab an $8 digital camera? Because (sensible being the operative word here), all the sensible people were using their $7 for something worthwhile.
I was so proud of myself when I "won" the bid for the camera. I did a little dance. I patted myself on the back. And then, and only then, did I decide to check the specs on this "camera." First off, don't digital cameras usually boast like 7,8, maybe even 12 megapixels? Maybe more, right? I don't know, I'm not a digital camera aficionado, but I do know the difference between 7 megapixels and oh, say...0.08. Yes, my brand new camera is kicking down doors with a whopping 0.08 megapixels. I add the 's' onto the end of megapixels with a heavy heart, because, if 4th grade math serves me correctly, 0.08 is less than 1. I will have much better luck drawing a picture with my toes. Wanna hear more? Does it come with accessories, you ask? Why sure it does! It comes with a serial (yes, SERIAL) port connector cable. What in the blue hell am I gonna do with a serial port connector cable? You know you're up shit's creek without a paddle when you product needs to be attached by the serial cable, circa 1995. I might as well have purchased a dot matrix printer.
Sigh. So now I have to wait for my digital etch-a-sketch to arrive. And when it does, I don't think I will even open the package. What's the point? It's not going to work, I won't be able to connect it to my laptop, and every picture I take will probably look like one of those weird posters everyone used to have back in the day. You know, the one where you had to stand like 6 feet away from the damn thing and cross your eyes to see the picture, because close up it was all dots and squares and shit.
For $7.99, I could have bought a pack of cigarettes. Even though I don't smoke, it still would have been more useful to me than this damn camera. Stop laughing!!
I've been in desperate need of a digital camera for quite some time now, and since I'm the last person on earth who doesn't have one, I decided that it was now or never. As far as purchases go, I usually do a very good job, and I almost always walk away with something that I really like. I'm not afraid to spend a lot of money on something, but like any person with 3 brain cells, I'd rather spend less if I can.
So, that was my motivation for going on eBay to purchase a digital camera this afternoon. I've known people who have gotten so addicted to eBay that they'd sell their toenails on there if it didn't hurt to rip them off, so I wanted to exercise caution and discretion. I wanted to go on the site, find an adequate digital camera, and then log off, never to darken eBay's door again.
First off, I see this digital camera for $7.99. Now, I'm a smart girl, but for some reason, by brains slid out of my pants when I saw the price. Shipping and handling was another $7.00. You're telling me I can have my very own digital camera for less than 15 bucks? Oh hell yes, I want it!
I should have known that something was wrong when I was the only bidder. There are always at least 75,000 people bidding for the most obscure things on eBay, so why wouldn't there be other sensible people trying to grab an $8 digital camera? Because (sensible being the operative word here), all the sensible people were using their $7 for something worthwhile.
I was so proud of myself when I "won" the bid for the camera. I did a little dance. I patted myself on the back. And then, and only then, did I decide to check the specs on this "camera." First off, don't digital cameras usually boast like 7,8, maybe even 12 megapixels? Maybe more, right? I don't know, I'm not a digital camera aficionado, but I do know the difference between 7 megapixels and oh, say...0.08. Yes, my brand new camera is kicking down doors with a whopping 0.08 megapixels. I add the 's' onto the end of megapixels with a heavy heart, because, if 4th grade math serves me correctly, 0.08 is less than 1. I will have much better luck drawing a picture with my toes. Wanna hear more? Does it come with accessories, you ask? Why sure it does! It comes with a serial (yes, SERIAL) port connector cable. What in the blue hell am I gonna do with a serial port connector cable? You know you're up shit's creek without a paddle when you product needs to be attached by the serial cable, circa 1995. I might as well have purchased a dot matrix printer.
Sigh. So now I have to wait for my digital etch-a-sketch to arrive. And when it does, I don't think I will even open the package. What's the point? It's not going to work, I won't be able to connect it to my laptop, and every picture I take will probably look like one of those weird posters everyone used to have back in the day. You know, the one where you had to stand like 6 feet away from the damn thing and cross your eyes to see the picture, because close up it was all dots and squares and shit.
For $7.99, I could have bought a pack of cigarettes. Even though I don't smoke, it still would have been more useful to me than this damn camera. Stop laughing!!
posted by CherriesTomorrow at 11:00 PM
1 Comments:
I've got a fantastic MP3 player that takes 1.2MB floppy diskettes. It's got your name all over it!
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